Confessions Of A Klutz: Confessions Series #1 Read online

  “Huh?”

  He takes my hand on the table, leaning forward. “Because not having you around is lonely, because all I can see when I close my eyes is your smiling face. I miss your voice, I miss your klutziness, I miss you.” His lips spread into a genuine smile. “That’s why I’m here in L.A.—taking you out.”

  “I thought you were here for work?” I ask, not wanting to address everything he’s said. My brain is on overload, a red flashing warning sounding inside telling me I’m going to explode any second.

  He shakes his head, keeping my hand in his as he leans back in his seat. “I could’ve done what I needed to on a video call, but I wanted to see you.”

  I laugh. “And I wasn’t there.”

  The waitress places our drinks on the table, stopping our conversation for a beat before he says, “I really didn’t know what happened, Vi. I swear.”

  “Yeah, well…” I look away. “I think she was planning to do it before I even landed. She asked to see me when she called before Christmas.”

  “If I could fire her and get someone else to run—”

  “No,” I interrupt. “I don’t want anything to do with her being fired. I want to start over. Fresh start and all that.”

  “Does that include us?” he asks, his eyes filled with hope. I want to tell him yes, but something is guarding my heart right now, so I stay silent.

  Why is adulting so hard?

  * * *

  “We shouldn’t be doing this,” I moan as Axel trails kisses up my neck, walking me backward down the hallway to my apartment door.

  After the best seafood I’ve ever tasted and a bottle of wine to myself, I’m feeling a little merry. Not enough to not know what’s going on, but enough to let my worries evaporate into thin air.

  “Hmmm.”

  “Axel.” My eyes roll into the back of my head as he sucks the skin on my neck, pushing me up against the wall. His hips thrust and I feel the hardness of his dick pressing against my stomach. My hand has a mind of its own as it reaches down and strokes him over his pants.

  “God, Vi.” He throws his head back.

  My lips spread into a smirk at the reaction I get and it’s right now I know I’ve never felt the way I do about him with anyone else. He brings out a side to me no one ever has. Not only that but he makes me feel like I’m the most beautiful person in a room full of people.

  “Let me inside,” he groans, bringing his face close to mine.

  “Is that a euphemism? You want inside my apartment, orrrr, inside my vagina?”

  He drops his lips to mine, pushing his tongue inside without missing a beat and twirling it with mine. My hands grip his shoulders, pulling him as close as I can.

  “Both,” he murmurs when he pulls away.

  He wraps his arms around my waist, picking me up. My legs automatically lock around his hips, thrusting against him and causing us both to moan.

  Dipping my head, I trail kisses down his neck as he moves us off the wall and walks forward.

  “Keys,” he demands.

  I hand him my purse, silently telling him they’re in there as I continue my ministrations.

  After several minutes, he manages to open my door, walking inside and slamming it behind us as he growls at each of my thrusts.

  “Fuck, I need you so bad right now.”

  I lift my head, planting a kiss on his lips and pushing my fingers through his hair. “I’m here, take me.”

  “Fuck me, those words… say them again.”

  I lower my voice. “Take me, Axel. Fuck me harder than you ever have.”

  He pushes me up against the door, letting me down and yanking the front zipper on my jumpsuit before pulling it off me. I sway to the side at his eagerness, surprised but loving it all at the same time.

  This is hot. He’s hot. God, why am I feeling so hot right now?

  He crouches down, taking my heels off before standing and picking me up again.

  The room spins as he twirls us around, only it doesn’t stop spinning when he sits down on the sofa, pulling my bra straps down my arms.

  I place my hand on the top of his head, trying to center myself.

  “Axel?”

  “I know, baby. I’ll make you feel—”

  “No—”

  “No?” he asks, pulling back and staring at me like I have two heads.

  My hand covers my mouth as I sway to the side. “I’m gonna be sick.” My stomach churns, my mouth watering to epic proportions as he pulls back.

  “What?”

  “I’m gonna throw up!”

  I try to get off him, but the room spins even more and makes it even worse. He grabs for me, lifting us off the sofa as he asks, “Bathroom?”

  “That door.” I try to point at it but my arm won’t lift properly.

  He pushes it open, placing me on the floor just in time for me to throw up all that amazing seafood.

  Well, that went well… not.

  Chapter 17

  Confession #88: I slipped in the shower and tried to grab water… because that will save me.

  I look out the window as we land at JFK, gripping the piece of paper Axel left for me the morning after the epic disaster that was our date.

  When I woke up in my underwear and in bed without him there, I was sure I’d scared him away with my epic throw up session. But when I walked into the living room and saw his scrawl on an envelope, I didn’t know what to think.

  I look down, opening it up and reading it for literally the thousandth time.

  Vi,

  Before your brain starts working overtime, I had to go back to New York for an emergency meeting, but I wish I was still there with you.

  Seeing you again made up my mind.

  I can’t live without you, Vi. <—that wasn’t some corny line, I MEAN it.

  Even if you have to stay in L.A., we can make this work. I know we can because I have a feeling you feel the same way.

  I’m crazy about you, have been since you showed up in my office and ripped your skirt. (Loved those panties by the way.)

  Just know I want to be with you, ONLY YOU. My plan went to shit yesterday when I saw you. I was meant to be romantic and hold myself back, but I never can where you’re concerned.

  Soooo… without sounding like a ten-year-old in the playground: will you be my girlfriend?

  PS. Love where you have my picture. ;)

  Axel.

  My lips spread into the widest smile, because as corny as it sounds, I know he means every word. When I realized he knew where I kept the picture of us, I started to panic. But then I got to thinking, what does it matter? However much I liked to try and deny it, I’d fallen head over heels for him too and now I need to do something about it.

  The airplane comes to a stop and everyone starts to stand, readying themselves to get off.

  Nerves flow through me at breakneck speeds as I step off the plane and onto New York soil. I don’t know what’s making me more anxious: the meeting with the publishing company, or pulling my plan off for Axel.

  I knew what I wanted to do as soon as I read his letter, but I’ve been radio silent since. No reason not to make him wait, right?

  Grabbing my carry-on, I feel deja vu as I walk through the airport, only this time Jeeves isn’t there to greet me. Instead, I take a taxi to the hotel the publishing company has arranged for me, ready to freshen up and head to the meeting scheduled in a couple of hours.

  One thing I didn’t miss about New York is the crazy taxi drivers. They’re their own special breed here.

  After I’ve checked in and gone up to my room, I throw my case on the bed, pulling my cell out and FaceTiming J.

  It rings and rings, and when I’m about to end it, he answers, his face coming into view but waaay too close.

  I chuckle. “Pull it away a little, J.”

  He does and I can tell he’s extending his arm as far as he can. “Violet,” he greets.

  “Hey, J. Just checking in. How’s Colonel Fourpaws?�
��

  “He ate a packet of food and two treats. He’s slept for three hours and bathed himself.” He spins the screen around, showing me where the cat is sitting on his lap before turning it back to face him. “He’s asleep again. Did you know cats sleep between sixteen and twenty hours a day?”

  “I didn’t,” I say, a soft smile on my face. “Is he behaving himself?”

  “Yes,” he answers, his lips pulling up into a ghost of a smile. “I used to have a cat, she was black and loved cuddles. Colonel Fourpaws loves cuddles too.”

  “He does.”

  “You look stressed,” J notes, his brows scrunching.

  “I’m just nervous.” I swipe my hand over my forehead. “What if they don’t like any of them? What if this is a waste of time?”

  I don’t expect J to answer, so when he says, “You’ll get the job, my tummy says so,” I can’t help but feel relieved.

  “Thanks, J.”

  “For what?”

  “Looking after Colonel Fourpaws and being my friend.”

  “I like friends, I have two. You and my dad.”

  I smile, but it’s a sad kind of smile. If only more people would take the time to get to know him. They’d be surprised at how much love he has to give.

  My head lifts, seeing the time on the clock. “Crap, J. I gotta go! I’ll call you later!”

  “Okay, bye.” The screen goes black and I chuckle at his abrupt farewell.

  * * *

  I look up at the building—you guessed it: glass and metal. This city is obsessed with them and I still don’t get the appeal.

  My hand slips on the handle of my leather bag containing some of my drawings. The nerves are rife. I think even my nerves are nervous.

  Several people walk out the doors, busy on their cells or talking to people while I stand in the middle of the sidewalk staring up at the building with the giant letters “FGT” displayed above the doors.

  This meeting could change my life. It could change everything… or nothing.

  Taking a deep breath, I steel myself and put one foot in front of the other, walking inside and being amazed by the foyer. There’re posters everywhere of the covers of bestselling books, docks where laptops sit for people to use all over the place, and little alcoves where people are curled up reading.

  I can’t work out where the front desk is, so when someone walks past me with a headset on, I step into his line of sight.

  “Hi, do you know where the front desk is?”

  He lifts his arm, pointing to the left. “Over there.”

  I turn to see where he’s pointing, saying, “Thanks,” as I turn back around, but he’s already gone. “Well okay then.”

  Walking over to the desk, I wait for the woman on a call to finish before stepping forward. “Hi, my name is Violet Scott, I have a meeting with—”

  “Larry De’lanto.”

  “I… I think so,” I reply, my voice seeming to leave my body. Crap, I’ve never felt like this before.

  “Take a seat.” She signals to a couple of white, leather sofas. “He’ll be down to collect you when he’s ready.”

  “Right, okay.”

  She smiles before I head over to the sofas, sitting down on the edge of one and holding my leather bag to my chest, watching as everyone comes in and out of the doors. There’s a group of people gathered to one side, all looking at a tablet before conversing.

  The atmosphere is easy, the people seeming friendly with looks of pleasure on their faces. These people love what they do. The sight is strange to see, but I find myself wanting to look the same way.

  “Miss Scott?”

  My head snaps up at the deep voice before I stand up, teetering on the heels I’m wearing before I right myself.

  “That’s me.” Stepping forward, I extend my hand slowly, trying to be more aware of my surroundings.

  He clasps my hand. “Nice to meet you, I’m Larry.” His dark-brown hair is graying at the temples, wrinkles showing around his eyes when he smiles, but his face is kind.

  “Violet,” I reply.

  He extends his arm. “Shall we?”

  “Sure.”

  I follow him up a staircase in the middle of the foyer, down a hallway filled with more posters of bestselling books and into a conference room where three other people are waiting.

  “This is Shelly, Lawrence, and Tanya.”

  “Nice to meet you.” I shake their hands in turn, cringing at the fact they can probably feel the sweat on mine. Ack.

  Sitting down opposite them all, I wait while Larry tells me what they do, the kind of books they’re publishing at the moment, and how the market is always changing.

  “We recently branched out into children’s books and are wanting to go into the graphic novel market.” He folds his hands on top of the big conference table. “That’s where you come in. One of our authors forwarded your drawings.”

  “Yes.” I clear my throat. “My cousin was doing some graphic design work for her and showed her them.”

  Tanya sits up straighter. “Is this something you like to do? Draw?”

  “I…” I bite down on my bottom lip. “I’ve never felt more at home than when I have a pen in my hand, creating something. I’m passionate about all different styles.” I unzip my leather bag, pulling some of my drawings out. “I can do soft and cuddly, but also horror, and anything in between.”

  Pushing them across the table, I wait with bated breath as they all take their turn to look at them.

  I can’t tell what any of them are thinking, not one flicker of any emotion in their eyes or on their faces. Crap. They don’t like them—

  “And you’re based in L.A.?” Lawrence asks.

  “I am, but relocating wouldn’t be a problem. I don’t have ties there.” My heart pangs when I think of J, but I push that to the side.

  “We do like to have our illustrators in house.” He tilts his head to the side. “Makes things easier with the line of work we’re in.”

  “Of course.” I smile brightly—too brightly, I probably look like the freaking Joker.

  They all start to murmur between themselves, the hand of the clock ticking away and shouting at me with every second that goes by.

  When Larry passes me my drawings and stands up, I take it as my cue to do the same, balancing my bag against my stomach as I slip them back inside.

  Is this all they wanted? Basically to see my face?

  “Thanks for coming in today, we’ll be in touch.”

  I step toward the door before blurting out, “Is that a ‘we’ll be in touch but not really’ kind of be in touch? Or a ‘we’ll actually be in touch’ kind of in touch?”

  Lawrence chuckles, his gaze meeting mine as he stands up too. “It’s a, ‘we’ll be in touch’ kind of in touch.”

  “Oh, right. Awesome… well, thanks for seeing me.”

  I step out of the room, Larry behind me as we walk back down the stairs where he shakes my hand again.

  “It was nice to meet you,” he tells me, giving nothing away.

  “You too.”

  He spins around and I watch as he walks away before turning around in a circle, wishing like hell I get this job because I feel in my bones this is meant to be.

  * * *

  I slip my cell into my purse with the biggest grin on my face as I step out of the elevator before looking back at Al. “Thanks, Al.”

  “You’re welcome, Miss Scott.”

  I watch as the doors close before stepping inside Axel’s penthouse suite. My gaze tracks everything, taking it all in and feeling like I just stepped inside my own home. Whether it’s his office, his home, or him—he just feels like home, like I’m meant to be right there with him.

  Tentatively I step forward, knowing I’m here alone but it’s perfect for my plan.

  My lips lift up into a smirk as I walk toward his bedroom. I’ve spent seven days planning this and I know he definitely won’t see it coming.

  Taking my jacket off, I set it do
wn on the chair in the corner of the room, placing my bag next to it.

  I spin around, taking in the huge bed Axel sleeps in, the gray bedding, and the bedside tables on either side. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, I take in a deep breath, wondering if this is the best way to do this.

  Who am I kidding? Of course it is!

  Standing back up, I start to undress until I’m left in only the black lace bra and panties complete with suspenders and stockings. I know, I know, I went all out. But you can only accept a girlfriend proposal once, right?

  Leaving my heels on, I sit on the edge of the bed and wait… and wait. I get restless, alternating between pacing and sitting with my legs crossed. An hour ticks by and I know he’ll be here any second—a door opens in the main room and my eyes widen as I jump up.

  I get into position, lying on my side, one leg over the other and propping my head up on my hand, listening as the footsteps stop outside the bedroom door.

  My heart beats wildly in my chest as someone murmurs and then the door handle moves, the door opening, revealing… Marcus—Axel’s dad.

  Scrambling up off the bed as his wide-eyed gaze meets mine, I search for something to cover myself. Grabbing onto the end of the bedding, I yank, expecting it to come free but it doesn’t because it’s tucked under the mattress. Why do the housekeepers make beds like this?! It’s a stupid, stupid system!

  “Dad?” Axel calls, his footsteps nearing. “Did you find it?” Marcus steps back, his mouth opening and closing but no sound coming out as a shadow falls over him. “Dad?”

  He comes closer, his face coming into view but his attention is focused on Marcus as I continue to try and pull the stupid bedding off to give me some dignity! Goddamn, shit!

  His gaze meets mine finally, widening as it tracks over my near naked body, a grin working its way over his lips. “Vi?”

  I straighten up, using my hands to try and cover some skin but it’s no use because I have two boobs and one vagina but only two hands.

  His dad steps to the side, spinning around before muttering, “I… erm… I… I’m gonna go.”